Why I Am Not Opposed to Gay Marriage

I'm not sure what a rainbow has to do with anything really.

I’m not sure what a rainbow has to do with anything really.

Yes.  I am a Christian and I do not oppose gay marriage.  I’m not only a Christian, you see.  I am also an American who believes in America and the beliefs upon which the United Sates was founded.  One piece of this is the fundamental right to the pursuit of happiness.  So if two men or two women think they need an official document that says that they are married, then so be it.  It does nothing to alter the state of my marriage or my beliefs concerning the meaning of marriage.

However, this does not mean that a person who has strong feelings against homosexual marriage ought to be required to participate in any manner they do not wish.  A pastor should not be required to marry a homosexual couple simply because it is legal.  Nor should a business be required to provide service to anyone if it means acting contrary to a fundamental belief of its proprietors. This is a highly charged issue no matter which side one stands on.  Rational discussion about whether gay marriage is right or wrong is almost impossible.  There’s too much emotion attached and competing moral, religious and political ideals all mixed into the issue.  I have simply come to the conclusion that, hey, if that will make you happy, go for it.

Now, before any one brands me as some kind of crazed apostate or neo-liberal, or even congratulates me on my new found p.c. tolerance on this issue, I am not saying that I support homosexual marriage.  If one asks me if I am for or against gay marriage, I will have to say that I am against it. I am just not going to actively oppose it.

  I have simply come to the conclusion that, hey, if that will make you happy, go for it.

I recognize that this is a complicated issue.  On the one hand I have searched Scripture for any positive mention of homosexuality whatsoever to no avail.  On the contrary, all mentions of it are negative and more often than not it is extremely negative.  Also, there is the Biblical meaning of marriage as a representation of the Church (the Bride) and Christ Jesus (the Bridegroom).  The Church is meaningless apart from Christ and Jesus sacrificed everything for the Church. One without the other is unthinkable.  Two such Brides and no Bridegroom is incomprehensible.  Two Grooms is just as  inconceivable.  Throughout the Bible, marriage is analogous with Christ’s relationship with his people.  Therefore, marriage is intended for a man and a woman.

Throughout the Bible, marriage is analogous with Christ’s relationship with his people.

Yet, I do not oppose gay marriage.  Like I said in the beginning, “If a piece of paper will make someone happy, let them have it. Be happy. ” But homosexuality is a sin!  How can you not be against it?” you might ask.  Again.  Like I said.  I am not encouraging homosexuality in anyway.  Scripture is clearly opposed to homosexuality and so every Christian including myself must refrain from it.

Receiving Jesus Christ is necessary to reaching God.

Receiving Jesus Christ is necessary to reaching God.

 I realize that I am a sinner saved purely by grace.

When I think about my salvation, however, I realize that I am a sinner saved purely by grace. I do not say that I used to be a sinner and now that I am saved, I no longer sin.  That would be foolish and a lie.  Jesus died for all the sins I have committed and every sin that I will commit.  I like to think that I sin less than I used to, but if the only one that it matters to compare one’s self to is the Almighty God, then I can make no claim to holiness.  Only God is holy.  The only difference between an unbeliever and a believer is salvation by the grace of God.  Nothing else really.  We could converse about the work of the Holy Spirit in the life of a believer of course, but that’s a different discussion and even then, we would be left with the fact that believers are still sinners saved by grace. We are no better than anyone else.  My message to any believer who thinks that he or she is better than anyone else is this: It’s time to get over yourself.  Only God is good and you are not He.

 It’s time to get over yourself.  Only God is good and you are not He.

It’s time to pull all this together.  For the sake of argument, let’s assume that Scripture is correct and that faith in Jesus Christ is the only Way to eternal life and anyone who does not believe in Him is doomed to Hell once their time in this life is over. I can only hope that someone who does not believe in Jesus can find happiness in this life then, because their afterlife is literally going to be hell. That’s my first point.

My second point is that I don’t think it is the Church’s job to spend inordinate amounts of time condemning anyone or any group.  Nor should it lie and say that something is okay when Scripture clearly demonstrates that it is not.  It should call sin a sin.  The Church needs preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  This is its primary job.  This is also exactly what it is not doing. I have previously written about the pieces of John 3:16.   This is Jesus’s summation of the Gospel (the Bible really) as only He could present it.

John 3:16

John 3:16

Also, I have posted concerning two dominant heresies confronting the true Church today, Oneness and the Prosperity Gospel.  I am not sure that dispensationalism is much better.  In fact, it strikes me to be potentially as damaging to evangelistic churches in the 21st century as Tillichian panentheism was for mainline churches in the 20th century. I have also attempted to define the Essentials of the Christian Faith. The Apostle’s Creed is a major player in defining the Christian Faith, for instance.  That is its purpose, after all. Belief matters, and let’s face it, what is widely held to be the Church is in reality an apostate farce and we wonder why society is as messed up as it is.

The Church needs preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  This is its primary job.

I am not ashamed of the Gospel.

I am not ashamed of the Gospel.

What’s the answer?  Get over yourself.  You are no better than anyone else in the world.  What you have going for you, if you are a believer in Jesus and therefore saved by grace, is that you have the advantage of the Holy Spirit to guide and empower you to spread the Gospel of Jesus Christ so that others may be saved as well.  That same Holy Spirit will encourage you and give you the  ability to not sin (you will never be perfect at this, but with the Holy Spirit, you can get better at it).  The Holy Spirit can empower and guide those who you reach out with the Gospel just as Jesus does to them through His Spirit. The honest, Christ centered, Holy Spirit driven preaching of the Gospel is the only way the world will be effectively changed.  So I choose to stand for Christ by preaching His Gospel found in the Bible and by loving my neighbors even if (or especially if) they are gay and married.

The honest, Christ centered, Holy Spirit driven preaching of the Gospel is the only way the world will be effectively changed.  

Feel free to agree or disagree in the comment section below.

God Bless,


12 thoughts on “Why I Am Not Opposed to Gay Marriage

    • I remember the words of Jesus when He told us to remove the log from our own eye before commenting on the speck in the eye of another. And Jesus said that the one without sin ought to cast the first stone. Do I need to go on? Remember Jesus’ Two Commands: Love the Lord and love your neighbor.
      Nobody follows the Law, my friend. And those who claim to in error are condemned by it and they do not know Christ.



    • The family unit of one woman and one man is the foundation of this country that was built on Chrstian principles. If that family unit erodes so will our foundation erode and this country will follow. Christianity wil survive, but barely. Fewer people will come to Christ because the Gospel of Christ will be preached in fewer and fewer churches becasue we allowed the foundation to crumble.


  1. This country was founded on Christian principles. It is not a theocracy, but the basic laws and , regulations that guides this country are Christian. The family unit: a man and a woman that are married and raising children in a Christian environment is the bedrock of this country. Without this solid bedrock this country would be on shifting sand and eventually cease to exist. In the beginning of your thesis I noticed a common theme of ” I ” believe. This opposition that we have to gay marriage is not about ” I ” but about ” US ” as in ‘we’ and also the United States. If gay marriage is allowed universally there will be children being raised in a same sex marriage. Or are you going to try to stop same sex couples from adopting children? These children will be raised thinking that smae sex marriage is alright. Or are you going to pass a law saying that it cannot be taught in the home or schools that same sex marriage is alright? I’ve heard same sex couples say they train their children to be free thinkers, which is good but their is a right way and a wrong way. My father smoked cigarettes, so I started smoking…at 14. My father drank occasionally so I started drinking occasionally … at 16. But I was raised in church where the Gospel of Jesus Christ was preached and even though I left that Way for a while I returned, became saved and now preach the Gospel myself. Here is a question for you: do you think a same sex couple would raise their children in a church that preaches the Gospel of Jesus Christ?


    • I don’t think a same sex couple is saved nor do I think that couple will set foot in a church that does not welcome them with the love of Christ. If a church is willing to do that and preach the Good News of salvation in Christ Jesus, then there is hope for them.

      This article really isn’t about same sex marriage. It’s about a failing, increasing;y apostate church that has lost its Way.


      • Whoa! I agree, more or less, with your original premise, although I submit that government should not be involved in licensing “marriages”, period. And, I also agree with you that the church needs to look toward its own apostasy rather than trying to correct what is wrong in the world through legislation, etc.

        However …

        I’m not exactly sure what you mean about “welcoming them with the love of Christ”. I can look over in 1 Corinthians and see that Paul was pretty adamant about sexual sins. It didn’t just include homosexuality, but I don’t think there’s any difference in God’s view between a man having sex with his father’s wife and two gay guys (or gals) having sex with one another. Both are sins. Paul was very clear about what the church should do about it — disfellowship the sinner. Not welcome them in as beloved of Christ.

        When I look around at the church today I see two varieties that are equally wrong in their approach. One type of church is condemning of sin to the point that they send the message that God’s salvation is not possible for those who are living in sin. That’s not true and it is unBiblical. The other type of church is so accepting of sinners that they allow the sin to be practiced openly, sometimes even saying it’s fine with God if you go on sinning. That is equally wrong.

        The church needs to get this straight. The Bible says that Jesus Christ died for all of our sins. We can and should welcome anyone who comes through the doors with whatever lifestyle they bring with love and the gospel, but we must be honest that God will not condone Christians who practice sin in their lifestyle, The Bible is clear that we’re supposed to change how we conduct our lives after we have come to know the Lord and if we don’t, the church must practice tough love by putting the continuing sinning Christian out of the fellowship with the clear message that they can return once they’ve repented.

        Anything less is not Biblical.


        • Paul was speaking of disenfranching believers in that passage. The assumption I am making in this article is that the homosexuals in question are nonbelievers. Paul’s comments notwithstanding, believers still need to heed Jesus ‘ words concerning judgment.
          The Church needs to preach the Gospel and let The Holy Spirit do the judging and convicting.


          • You make a good point about the difference between believers and non-believers; The Church needs to recognize that legislating morality is not why we’re here. However, the Church very much is meant to judge BELIEVERS, according to 1 Corinthians 5. If your hypothetical non-believing gay couple become Christians, then what? Are you going to accept them as a “family” in church membership? Are you going to ignore their sin and let their yeast leaven the whole lump?

            By the way, this discussion really isn’t about gays or gay marriage. We could broaden it to sexual sin in the Church generally. Barna found that 40% of churchgoing unmarried 20- and 30-somethings are having sex outside of marriage, and the second marriages in evangelical churches is 33%. Clearly, the modern Church has a real problem with sexual sin. Perhaps that comes from the Church’s general unwillingness to confront it within our own congregations.


  2. Chris, part of the problem is that the law defines “marriage,” which is a civil matter to which certain rights and obligations attach. The religious ceremony and its spiritual and communal significance are matters of “the church.” Although there is a clear logical distinction between the two, most people find them intertwined. Perhaps for a different reason, I agree that gay marriage is not a threat to either religion or civil society.

    As to homosexuality, I ask what we really know about it? Are we in a position to judge? Is a good Christian really able to “love the sinner “AND hate the act? And, what do we do with the hermaphrodite? What if such a person has a committed relation with a person of either sex, is that homosexuality; is it a heterogeneous relationship? What about the androgen-insensitive male” or the various genetic combinations and grouping which combine to confound “normal” sexual identification? I have a website, Love and Do Not Judge, http://lovejudgenot.wordpress.com/, in which I ask these questions. There are many people who struggle with such physical circumstances which are “gifts from our creator, but don’t fit society’s norm or religious dogma. What do we really know? Whose command should the Christian follow: Jesus’ “new law” to love and do not judge? Or Paul’s judgment, consistent with “the Law:” homosexuality is sinful; judge with discernment? Then I think of the favorite “wedding” scripture of 1 Corinthians 13: above all of the other gifts, including faith, the greatest is love.

    Chris, I do appreciate your this forum, and I hope not to overstep the bounds.


    • It is a difficult and complex matter. I, personally have no problem loving the sinners while hating the sin. Love would be impossible if not for this ability. The fact is that the Bible says nothing good about homosexuality. As much as I may wish to, I cannot get around that. How I act toward other sinners is what I am accountable for. So I choose to demonstrate my love for God by loving my fellow sinners as my self (however imperfectly). By doing so, I follow all the Commandments and prophets.

      That’s the goal, anyway.



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